Every Time I Come Out, It Comes Out Different

So, my regular post is still coming on Friday.  This one is just for fun.

A year or so after I started on hormones, I started a transition note-book, and kept a list where I would write down the ways in which I would come out to people.  The list spans lots of years, and are not in any particular order.  I think that I will soon turn these into a song.

  • I haven’t been male for a long time.
  • I have been on estrogen for a couple of years.
  • I’m not male any more.
  • I never identified as male.
  • I never expected that I would become male as I grew up.
  • I always believed that I would grow up to be a girl.
  • I am female now.
  • I am having surgery soon.
  • I had surgery last year.
  • I have been on estrogen for many years.
  • I am transsexual.
  • I am transgender.
  • Mom, I’m not male.
  • By the time that I met H., I knew this was first date stuff.
  • When I started to get muscles, I became extremely distressed.  That is when I knew it was time to find a doctor.
  • Dogs think that I am a girl.
  • My body chemistry is a females.
  • I had the last of my male parts removed last week.
  • H. as always accepted me as a girl from the time that we met, 22 years ago.
  • I am a woman now.
  • Not Mr.,  Ms.
  • That’s ma’am.
  • I will be starting my next job as female.
  • Dr. K. saw about 25 other patients who are trans.
  • I had surgery years ago, the year we moved into this house.
  • I stopped seeing the CIA spying outside my window, after I started on estrogen.  (this is true … estrogen had a very positive mental effect on me)

You might notice that I like to be obliquely blunt.  Of course, my actual gender identity is way more complicated than these one-liners indicate.  I am confidently yet not stereotypically female.  I am trans.  Depending on many factors, people usually peg me as either butchy woman or gay guy.  I am not Mr., Sir, he, or him.  More about all of that in later posts.


6 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. georgiakevin
    Sep 24, 2014 @ 11:02:56

    What a captivating blog!

    Liked by 1 person


  2. Jamie Ray
    Sep 24, 2014 @ 11:45:49

    You were the first blogger/reader who made it clear to me that the middle was really an option. And while I think everyone’s middle is unique, or at least I would like to convince myself that my middle is unique, my question would be is there a universal difference in being in the middle depending upon which end you started at? And what are the similarities?
    It is a rhetorical question, but one that I’m interested in.



    • The Final Rinse
      Sep 25, 2014 @ 08:00:01

      I will put a little thought into these questions. I think that I will write about it for tomorrow’s post. (BTW, I am more of a similarities person.)
      I am happy to have said something that resonated with you. I live in this world every day. When I speak of my experience to most people, they simply have no way to relate to it. It has been valuable to me to have dialogue with other people with similar life experience with gender. Your eloquent, creative posts are part of what made me decide that it was finally time to start writing.



  3. janitorqueer
    Oct 06, 2014 @ 16:05:16

    I love, “Dogs think that I am a girl.”



    • The Final Rinse
      Oct 06, 2014 @ 17:22:57

      We got our dog a few months after I started on hormones (6 years ago, I think). Based upon the theory that dogs see the world through there noses, Fonzi never knew me as anything but female.
      These are the small obscure victories that we trans* persons encounter.



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