The Purpose of this Blog.

Because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spew you out.

Each time that I engage in conversations with others on the trans* spectrum, I think: I have something to say on this topic. I should be blogging about this. Blogging about what it is to live in the world as transgender, as neither male nor female, as both male and female, as non-binary. Writing about medical transition, hormones and doctors. Scribbling about threats of aggression and violence in public, the experience of having ones gender correctly or incorrectly read, acceptance from others, complications of relationships, gender stereotypes, and of the power of clothing. Talking of being a survivor of sexual violence. Speaking of feminism. Writing of the commonalities and non-commonalities of the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender experiences. Complaining about public restrooms. Writing about existing as visibly “other”.

I will not be afraid to ask big questions like: how does the experience of being transgender speak to the universal experience of all humans, and of all sentient beings? What parts of the human experience are amplified by being transgender? What does it mean to be other, to be othered, to be in between?

I will be neither moping and griping, nor bragging and whooping about my experiences. I will try to illustrate myself at my weakest, and at my most vulnerable. I will attempt to be honest, and to not be a poser.

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2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Jamie Ray
    Sep 20, 2014 @ 17:02:22

    I’m glad you are writing. It is a hard thing to be honest – to admit to yourself and to commit it to paper/internet for others to read.
    Sometimes I feel like how much is there to say about being sir’d, peeing, and griping about how hard it is to buy a shirt that looks good on me, but it is really about how difficult it is to carve out a safe/comfortable space in a semi-hostile environment and about not spending all my time inside my head or apartment.

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    • The Final Rinse
      Sep 21, 2014 @ 10:22:16

      Since I am now writing my own posts and not just responding to others, I very consciously do not just want to put up rambling journal entries. When I have sat down to write, I have realized that all of my potential topics are big, giant complicated monstrosities. Even my “I Gotta Go Pee” topic became too complicated. To tell my “Gotta Pee” story, I need to tell my worst most horrible restroom story, which I don’t know if I am willing to share. Everything to do with gender has just dominated every inch of my life. Plus, I need to make some decisions about where the line of public and private is. Being a pre-digital age person, I am wary of just slapping my life up online. So, there is this path between honest yet not too honest which I am trying to navigate. Philippe Petit where are you?
      I thought that I could write a post each weekend, edit it throughout the week, then post a halfway well crafted essay each Friday. But, Friday rolled around, and I was still wrestling with all of my issues. So I just sat down and wrote about what I intend to write. A cop out.
      Maybe, this week, I will write about that line of public vs. private.

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